Well, if pi0=pi0(M) is already a group, then H∗(M)approxH∗(M)[pi−10]. So M and OmegaBM have the same homology in this case. This isn't quite enough on its own, but if you can produce a map MtoOmegaBM which induces this homology isomorphism, then the result follows using the Hurewicz theorem.
What McDuff-Segal actually do is show that if M is a topological monoid which acts on a space X, in such a way that every minM induces a homology equivalence xmapstomxcolonXtoX, then you can produce a "homology fibration" f:XMtoBM with fiber X. "Homology fibration" means that the fibers of f are homology-equivalent to the homotopy fibers of f.
If pi0M is an abelian group, you can find an X such that XM is contractible, and the fiber of f:XMtoBM is X. This gives the homology equivalence you want, since the homotopy fibers of f look like OmegaBM.
Take a look at McDuff and Segal's paper, it's nice. There is a also a treatment in terms of simplicial sets in Goerss-Jardine, *Simplicial Homotopy Theory".
Added: The functor MmapstoOmegaBM is the "total derived functor of group completion". The only convincing explanation of why this is so (that I'm aware of) is in Dwyer-Kan, Simplicial Localizations of Categories, JPAA (17) 267-283. Though they work simplicially, and work more generally (with categories in place of monoids), they show that M is a cofibrant simplicial monoid, then the simplicial monoid M[M−1] is weakly equivalent to the space Omega|BM|.
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